


Supergirl Returns Outtakes

by MarcusRowland



Series: Supergirl Returns [13]
Category: DCU (Movies), Doctor Who, Hancock (2008), Numb3rs, Supergirl (1984), The Sandman, West Wing
Genre: surprise crossover
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-06-21
Updated: 2015-05-26
Packaged: 2017-11-08 06:50:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/440347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarcusRowland/pseuds/MarcusRowland
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I've had a few ideas for the Supergirl Return series that for one reason or another haven't made it into the "canon" stories. I'll be posting some of the better bits here...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Speedster

This is a 100-word Drabble, an outtake from my Supergirl Returns stories - about all that you need to know is that in a previous story Nightwing crossed from the Justice League universe to another (based on the movies) where superheroes are a lot less common, and told Batman about the heroes of his world. Someone asked me who the Flash would be...

All characters belong to various media corporations of doom etc., this may not be distributed on a profit-making basis

**Speedster**

"You said your Flash was a superhero," said Batman.

"Different universe, different guy," Nightwing said apologetically. "At least what I knew about Barry Allen helped track him down."

"A police laboratory chemical spill and electrocution. Fortunately OSHA records show only one recent accident victim that fits the profile you remember."

"Who killed Joker, Scarecrow, Toyman, Poison Ivy..."

"Forgive me if I don't cheer."

Superman flew into the cave, saying "Star Labs can contain him until the trial."

"In the long term?" Batman asked grimly.

"I'm building a cell on the moon."

"Good. The Bay Harbor Speedster must never escape."

**End.**

Crossover with _Dexter_ , of course. Needless to say this will NOT be canon for my stories...


	2. Like Zits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NCIS / West Wing / DC / Hancock / Doctor Who crossover - SERIOUS spoilers for NCIS season 9 episode 200.

“What the hell happened?” asked Gibbs, looking around the diner. Everyone else in the room seemed to be frozen in place. To one side a teenager held a gun, which had a trace of flame and smoke around the end of the barrel, also seemingly frozen.

“It’s okay,” said a woman’s voice from behind him.

He snapped his head round, and saw a young-looking Goth, wearing black jeans and a black tank top, a studded leather belt, and black leather boots. Her skin was unusually pale, and she had an ankh on a chain around her neck. She reminded him of Abby.

“We’ve met before,” she added, “but you won’t remember.”

“Who are you?”

“You’ve just been shot. Ever heard of near-death experiences?”

“I have. If you’re saying what I think you are, where’s the scythe?” He felt strangely calm, and wondered why there was no pain.

“Don’t need one. Apart from anything else, this isn’t your time. But you came close enough that it gives me a chance to talk to you.”

“So talk.”

“I have a weird question for you. When you hijacked Air Force One, who was President?”

“Bartlet, of course.”

“Thought so.”

“Let me get this straight; Death is asking me pop history questions?”

“It’s important. How long has Hancock been a superhero?”

“Is that what they call him now? More like a drunken bum. I recall my Dad saying he nearly collided with him during flight training over LA in forty-two, and he’d been around for decades even then.”

“Okay. What year did Superman first arrive on Earth?”

“Some time in the nineties… ninety-six or seven? It feels like he’s been around forever.”

“Batman?”

“He showed up a year or so before Superman came back. Maybe oh-four or oh-five?”

“And Supergirl?”

“The first time in oh-two, I think. A few months after Superman went missing. Then she came back in oh-eight.”

“Thanks.”

“Is that it? Don’t I get an explanation?”

“You wouldn’t find it comforting, and you’ll forget it when time starts up again.”

“Tell me anyway.”

“Okay… a few years back this particular branch of the multiverse was destroyed by a freak time machine accident. It got fixed, but the repair was botched a little. Believe it or not, Hancock and Superman weren’t around before it happened, neither were Batman or Supergirl, although they already existed in some other timelines. Lots of other changes too, ranging from different presidents to a dozen or so cities that never existed before.”

“That’s crazy.”

“Told you that you wouldn’t like it.”

“So why were you asking?”

“Think of it like… like zits. First you get a couple of spots, that’s the sign things are changing. That was Hancock and Superman. Then you got Batman and Supergirl, and a couple more you probably haven’t heard of yet. Give it another few years and there’ll be more superheroes than you can shake a stick at.”

“That’s good, isn’t it?”

“You think so?” There was sarcasm in her voice. “What are superheroes for?”

“Damned if I know. Causing me problems, mostly.”

“And what else?”

“Dealing with disasters, fighting bad guys? Oh, is that it… If we need more heroes, there will be more things for them to fight?”

“Give the man a kewpie doll. Okay, time’s up, you need to get back to business.” She vanished with the rustle of invisible wings. Time resumed, and Gibbs instantly forgot her.

**end**


	3. The New Neighbour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a story fragment that was originally going to be part of my Supergirl Returns series, but I couldn't get the plot to develop past these opening scenes; I think that there will be a NUMB3RS crossover in the series eventually, just not one that starts quite this way.

On a Sunday in April Alan looked out of his bedroom window and noticed someone clearing the back yard of the house on the next lot. “About time”, he thought. The house had been on the market for months. It wasn’t a craftsman design like his home, just a bungalow from the late forties; reasonably well designed and built, but nothing special, and for the last few years it had been poorly maintained. In the months the house had been empty the garden had become a little overgrown, and the fence between the lots had been flattened in places by a recent storm. Alan was still waiting to hear back from the realtor about repairing it.

After breakfast he went over to take a closer look. The girl doing the gardening was a beautiful blonde in her twenties, wore jeans and a black _Aquarium of the Pacific_ T-shirt, and was clearing the overgrown grass around the trees with a weed whacker. A white puppy dozed nearby, under the shade of a bush, its lead tied to one of the porch rails. She looked up as he approached the largest gap in the fence, switched off the motor, and said “Good morning, I hope we aren’t disturbing you?”

“No, I was just wondering what was happening.”

“I’ve just moved in.”

“I didn’t realise it had been sold. Oh, I’m forgetting my manners – I’m Alan Eppes.”

“Linda Lee. I didn’t buy it, I’m renting while I’m in college.”

“Which college?”

“UCLA; I’m studying engineering.”

“My younger son lectures there sometimes. Charles Eppes.”

“Um…” She thought for a second then said “Amita’s boyfriend?”

“That’s him. You know Amita?”

“She’s a friend of a friend.”

A tall dark-haired man wearing jeans, a faded Metropolis U sweat shirt, work boots and glasses came out of the house with a wrench in his hand. “I’ve got the water on and the water heater seems to be working, but it’s not running very well; you’ll need a real plumber for that.” He had a mid-western accent. He noticed Alan, and added “Good morning.”

“Clark,” said Linda, “this is Mister Eppes, my neighbour. Mister Eppes, this is my cousin Clark, Clark Kent. He’s helping me move in.”

“Call me Alan. It’s nice to meet you. Do you need a hand with anything? My sons ought to be around later if you need any heavy lifting.”

“It’s mostly done now,” said Clark, “but there is one thing. Is there an animal shelter around here?”

“Why would I need an animal shelter?” asked Linda.

“Let me put it this way… you’re going to want a cat.”

“Why would I want a cat when I’ve got Shelby? Won’t they fight?”

“You’ll need a cat to get rid of the mice.”

Linda muttered something and added “No wonder the rent was so low!”

“The place hasn’t been looked after very well the last few years,” said Alan. “The Humane Society is on South Raymond Avenue; I can look up the exact address and phone number if you like.”

“That’d be great,” said Linda, “they haven’t connected the phone and cable yet, but I’ve got my cell.”

“I’ll go look it up. While I’m inside, can I get you anything? Coffee, or maybe a cold drink?”

“I don’t want to impose, but coffee would be really nice. I’m not sure I’m going to trust the faucet until it’s been run for a while, and I haven’t organized bottled water yet.”

“No problem. How about you, can I get you anything?” He nodded to Clark.

“Coffee would be great, if it isn’t too much trouble. Linda’s probably right about the water.”

“I’ll be back soon.”

A few minutes later Alan came back with tray loaded with a Thermos pot of coffee, cream, sugar, and a bowl of cookies. Clark was setting up a table and some folding chairs.

“Can I give you a hand with that?” asked Linda.

“I think there’s just room to put the tray through.”

“Won’t you join us?” asked Linda, taking the tray.

“Well, if you don’t mind…”

“Please, come in. It’s really nice of you to be so helpful.”

Alan edged through the gap. “That reminds me,” said Alan, digging into his pocket for a paper, “here are the Humane Society details. And numbers for the bottled water supplier we use, they’re pretty reliable, and a couple of good plumbers.”

Linda put the tray on the table and took the paper. “That’s great. I’ll get over to the shelter as soon as I can.”

“How long have you been in LA?” asked Alan, taking a seat.

“A few months,” said Linda, “I needed to work when I left school, but last year I came into a little money and decided to put myself through college.”

“That’s an expensive business.”

“I used the money I inherited to develop some designs for science toys, and sold the idea to BalliToy. I just got the first royalties, that’s paying the bills.”

“Brains as well as beauty.”

“Thank you.” Linda blushed slightly as she picked up the pot and poured three cups.

“How about you, Clark? Been in LA long?”

“I’m just in town for a few days,” said Clark. “Fortunately there’s a press convention at the Staples Center this week, I got in a couple of days early to help Linda move.”

“I thought I knew your name,” said Alan. “Daily Planet, right?”

“That’s right.”

“You must know that Lois Lane then, now she’s a great reporter! All those Superman stories... But I guess they have to have people for the other stuff. Do you see much of her?”

“A little,” said Clark, smiling.

“Don’t let him fool you,” said Linda. “He’s married to her.”

“That’s right, spoil my fun.”

“He loves it when people have heard of her but not him.”

“I’m not keen on the spotlight,” said Clark, “and it’s sometimes useful if people don’t know who I am. She’s the superstar, the Pulitzer winner; I try to fly under the radar while she’s attracting all the attention.”

“Then I won’t apologies for getting things wrong,” said Alan. “Do you have any children?”

Clark pulled out his wallet and showed Alan a picture of a brunette woman and a small boy, about eight years old. “That’s Jason. They’re not out here this trip, but I’m hoping we’ll all be able to make it in a few weeks. How about you?”

“I’ve got two sons – Don’s with the FBI, Charlie’s a mathematician. So… have you met Superman?”

“I’ve interviewed him a couple of times, and he’s saved Lois’s life a whole bunch of times.”

“Closest I’ve been was Gotham City Stadium. I was there for my cousin’s kid’s Bat Mitzvah, stayed on to catch the Dodgers - Gotham Cubs game, which turned out to be the day Superman came back. They were only a couple of innings into it when he landed that plane in the stadium. Ten out of ten for saving lives, of course, but he ruined a pretty good game. The Dodgers blew it in the rematch.”

Clark grinned. “Superman gave a press conference a few days after Luthor tried to destroy Metropolis. Everyone else was asking what he was going to do about the earthquake damage, someone from Sports Illustrated asked why he interrupted the game – it turns out he was actually aiming for the car park outside the stadium, but there were too many people around, he couldn’t see a clear space to put it down.”

“Someone should write a book,” said Alan. “One of those alternate histories, where the plane ended up somewhere else and the Dodgers won the series.”

“It’s an interesting idea. Do you mind if I make a note of that? I’ve been working on some fiction; it might be useful some day.”

“Be my guest. Reminds me to ask, is the puppy named after John Shelby? The ball player?”

“Yes and no,” said Linda. “He’s actually Shelby junior, his dad lives on the Kent farm in Kansas.”

“But I named his dad for John,” said Clark.

“Good name,” said Alan. “Now, I’d better let you get on with moving in. Are you sure I can’t do anything to help?”

“I can’t really think of anything right now,” said Linda. “But I probably will sooner or later. Better get away now while you can.”

Alan laughed, and said “There’s still some coffee left in the pot, you might as well finish it. If you could bring everything back when you’re done that would be good.”

“I will,” said Linda, “and thanks again.”

“That’s what neighbours are for.”

 

II

“We have a new neighbour," Alan said a few hours later. “Beautiful girl, about twenty-two or so; says she knows Amita.”

“Really?” said Charlie Eppes. “What’s her name?”

“Linda Lee. She’s a student, older than most, just starting at UCLA.”

“Linda… oh, I remember. We went to a party when she was house-sitting in Long Beach. Seemed like a nice girl, I didn’t really talk to her much.”

“Who was she house-sitting for?” asked Don Eppes.

“Some British rock star, can’t recall the name.”

“I hope there won’t be too many noisy parties,” said Alan.

“It wasn’t that bad,” said Charlie. “I could talk without shouting.”

“That’s something, I guess. Her cousin was helping her move in, a reporter called Clark Kent. He’s married to Lois Lane, the reporter who got the first Superman interview.”

“About six-four, wears glasses?” asked Don

“That’s right.”

“I’ve met him. Nice guy. You remember I spent a month in Metropolis after Luthor’s earthquake? When they drafted in a lot of extra personnel to shut down his rackets? Kent gave us a lot of leads, things he and Lane had found while they were working on the story. He must have saved us a couple of weeks, and he didn’t even ask for any credit, just a heads-up when we were ready to start making arrests.”

Charlie looked out of the window. “That must be him now.” He watched as Clark manoeuvred a plank into position at the edge of one of the gaps in the fence, and began to fix it in place. “Yes, I remember now, I met him at Linda’s party.”

Don joined him at the window. “Yes, that’s him.” Linda was briefly visible in the gap, handing Clark a hammer, and Don added “Very nice.”

“I thought you were back with Robin.”

“I am. I’m not blind though.”

“She’s a looker,” said Alan. “Brains, and beauty, and she’s studying engineering. If I were about thirty years younger…”

“Thirty, dad?”

“Well, maybe thirty-five.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was going to be a plot in there, but it reads like an info-dump, and I eventually decided that the basic premise was wrong. It's actually a fairly expensive neighbourhood, judging by the homes we've seen in NUMB3RS, and not the sort of place where a house would be allowed to deteriorate, or a student could easily rent a house; also, Batman would undoubtedly check out all the neighbours before Linda even looked at a house, and would point out the problems that might arise from living next door to the family of a detective.
> 
> Some of the ideas I was developing for this have found their way into two earlier stories, _Five Dates Supergirl Didn’t Enjoy… And One She Did_ and _Cat Chaser;_ basically, anything set in Linda's home probably derives from one of the drafts of this story or the notes for it, but she's living in a slightly cheaper area.


	4. Cat Chaser Part 2 Extended Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Cat Chaser_ part 2 has several epilogues, one of them set in Avengers Tower in New York, where Tony Stark receives a small present from another universe sent by Dick and Kara. The first three paragraphs were in the original story, the rest was cut because it wasn't really essential to the story; I'm posting it now because it highlights a technological problem that doesn't seem to turn up as often as it should in parallel world stories.

"Okay," said Tony Stark. "This stuff is gold. We need to make deals with all of the actors, writers and production companies. At least half of the Firefly episodes are completely new, about a third of Galactica, and I've never even heard of Wormhole X-Treme. We're sitting on a fortune."

"Methinks," said Thor, "they were intended as a gift for us, recompense for the trouble caused by the cat. They were meant for us to enjoy. To think only in terms of profit is..."

"Good business sense," Tony interrupted. "Don't worry, we'll get to watch them first. Can't wait to see how this version of Firefly handled the time travel and alien contact story arcs..."

He put the disk into a DVD player. It whirred for several seconds, then rejected the disc. Tony picked it up and looked at it more carefully, but it didn't seem to be damaged or defective. He had a sudden thought, and got out one of his own discs and compared them, then got out a laser pointer and shone it at the surface of one disc, then the other. Both of them reflected the laser light into a series of dots. "Notice anything different, Thor?"

"There were more dots for Kara's disc."

"Correct! Give the god a Kewpie doll! The surface of a DVD is a diffraction grating, the number of dots should be the same for any disk. If it's different, it means they probably use a different laser frequency to play the discs."

"And?"

"And that means their technology is different enough that they're probably using different disc rotation speeds, maybe a different algorithm to compress the data, probably a different encryption scheme."

"It is unfortunate, but I am sure that the gift was meant well."

"JARVIS can probably crack it." Tony put the disk into a workstation. "JARVIS, analyze this and try to figure out how to read it. Check the history of DVD development, any DVD patents that mention different frequencies, that sort of thing."

"Of course, sir." The drive light began to blink.

"We won't be watching it tonight, but give JARVIS a day or two and we'll be in business."

"You sound very sure."

"DVD is old technology here, probably is in Kara's world too. The fact that they even call it DVD probably means they followed a similar path to develop it, probably some of the same corporations and engineers worked on it. They couldn't make it too complicated because they couldn't build a powerful computer into a DVD player back then, it had to be slow and stupid, which means that we can probably crack it. Eventually, anyway."

"Very well," said Thor. "Let me know when it is done." He went off in search of Jane and Darcy.

Tony turned back to JARVIS. "Okay, let's see if we can get this cracked before the weekend, I feel like watching some TV..."

**end**

Prompted by too many stories where someone from a parallel worlds has DVDs and other electronic records that instantly work with another universe's electronics.


	5. Down Mexico Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit difficult to explain without spoiling it - see the end notes instead. Bad language towards the end.

They’d known going in that the deal was risky, but the FBI and Federales were strangling the cross-border arms trade, and the goods on offer – fully automatic weapons, sniper rifles with armour-piercing rounds, and some shoulder-launched missiles and C4 plastic explosive – were essential if they were to have any chance of success. What they hadn’t expected was the gang that attacked as they were collecting the shipment, and the masked lunatic who led them. Now they were pinned down miles from anywhere, their truck jammed between two boulders, with armed paramilitaries of some sort firing at anything that moved.

“Come out now,” said the muffled, vaguely German-accented voice of their leader. “We caught your daughter trying to escape; I will give her to my men if you do not surrender, and your deaths will be slow and painful.”

“What do you want?”

“Your son has skills I can use. Give him to me.”

“Go to hell!” shouted John.

Sarah shouted “Prove to me my daughter’s still alive. Show her to me.”

There was a pause then the leader appeared dragging the bound girl, one huge hand clasped around her neck, the other holding a gun to her head.

“Kill them all,” shouted Sarah.

The mercenary laughed then grunted as the girl head-butted him. There was ripping noise as the ropes around her wrists snapped, and she spun round and ripped the gun from his hand before he had time to react, firing at him then apparently randomly into the surrounding trees. There were screams and more shots, and the leader staggered back towards her, grabbed a shoulder, and tried to pin her in a wrestling hold.

“Crap,” said John, trying to get a clear shot at the masked giant. “I think he’s another terminator.”

“He’s bleeding too much. Wait.”

Cameron shot the leader again then emptied the remainder of the clip into the trees. Although she couldn’t see it, Sarah Connor was sure that there were now a lot less mercenaries. Cameron rarely missed.

Sarah spotted one of the gunmen trying to sneak around to get a shot at them, and shot him; he dropped, but she couldn’t tell if he was wounded, dead, or faking it, so put another bullet into his head to be sure.

There were still occasional shots, but they mostly seemed to be aimed at Cameron, who was watching the leader as he staggered towards her. As he started to run she side-stepped him, caught his arm, and swung him around so that his head hit a tree, then jumped on his back and put her arm around his neck. He staggered but didn’t go down, and tried to head-butt her back, only stopping when Cameron ripped the mask from his face. He screamed and began to convulse, then died as Cameron finally snapped his neck.

Once Cameron reached one of the bodies and got an assault rifle the rest was soon over; the remaining mercenaries died as fast as she could pull the trigger. After a minute or so she turned back towards Sarah and John. There were several bullet holes in her torso, seeping a little synthetic blood. It didn’t look like any of them had done much harm. “That’s the last of them.”

“What the hell was that about?” said John. “Who was that guy?”

“He would have been a resistance leader if he had lived,” said Cameron. “I didn’t recognize him until I removed the mask. He was killed before I was captured by your forces.”

“What was his name?” asked Sarah.

“He was called Bane. He led the resistance in the Gotham City area. Somehow he managed to get hundreds of police underground before Skynet attacked, without him most of them would have been killed.”

“Fuck. Okay, tell Derek when we get back to LA, he might know if there’s someone who can take his place. Now, let’s get the truck fixed and get out of here before we have more company…”

**end**

_Batman: The Dark Knight Rises / Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles_

This is a fairly old fragment - I wanted to explain why the events of _The Dark Knight Rises_ didn't happen in the _Supergirl Returns_ universe, and remembered that I'd mentioned Cyberdyne and Zeiratech in _The Return_ , which meant that Sarah, John, and Cameron were around somewhere. For various reasons I've decided not to follow up on this idea as it is, but it works reasonably well as a stand-alone piece.


End file.
